Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! Yes, we are still here! We were hoping to travel to Russia (and Wyoming) by now, but obviously God's timing is not our own. We just received notice last week that another family has been chosen to travel at the end of December, which means our plans are on hold again. We will definitely be next to receive an invitation (we were one of only two families still waiting in our region); however, based on the current timeline, it will now likely be March or April before we are invited on our first trip to meet Hope. On the bright side, this actually gives us more time to get ready, financially and administratively. We still need to complete our immunizations, update our CIS filing and other documents that are about to expire and work on some additional grant applications, so we would have been scrambling to get everything done over the holidays. We are reminded that God's timing is perfect, and so we wait ...

We would like to take this time to thank everyone who has supported our journey this year. Our Usborne Book sales raised over $1,000 for Hope and we are waiting to hear from two grant applications to be processed. One was denied last month due to more applications than funds available and two more are up for review in January (please pray we are approved). We held two garage sales, one in the spring and one in the fall, which together raised over $1,200. Our online coffee store generated almost $500. And we have had many friends and family generously give "just because!" God has certainly blessed our journey and we are excited to see what 2011 brings!

For those of you who expected us to be in Wyoming by now, we thought we'd give you a little update. We traveled to Cheyenne at the end of January after successfully jumping through all of the hoops required for our move. We were certain that things were moving along only to find out at the end of February that we had not gotten the job that would have made it possible to go at this time. Then we received notice from our adoption agency that we had been assigned to a region and would travel in 2-4 months. We decided to update our Home Study in Ohio to avoid complications that could prevent our travel and interrupt the process. While we were busy doing that, controversy arose surrounding Russian adoptions when a Tennessee woman put her 7 year old adopted son on a plane back to Moscow in April, accompanied only by a note that said she no longer wanted him. While many regions allowed adoptions to continue, our region came to a full stop while a bilateral agreement was discussed between the US and Russia. Several meetings have taken place between our two countries since then (including one that had to be postponed due to the volcano in Iceland) and an agreement is expected to be signed early next year. Just in time as the Russian Duma has been arguing about whether or not to ban international adoptions altogether until an agreement is signed. We have definitely had our share of obstacles this year, but things are finally moving again!

The "good" news during all of this is that several families assigned to our region dropped out of the adoption process, bumping us up on the list to one of three remaining families in August. The first of the three remaining families was invited to travel on their first trip at the end of August. We had the privilege of meeting this family (who live in Mason, Ohio) and learning all about their travel experiences over lunch in October. What we learned only makes us all the more determined to complete this long process and bring Hope home. Please pray that she has what she needs not just to survive, but to thrive while she waits for us!

Long story short, since the incident in April, our agency has been urging all families to keep their documents up-to-date and not to make any significant life changes, we have postponed pursuing our plans to relocate until later. How much later? We don't know. We only know that we are on God's timeline. As it says in Proverbs 16:9, "In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD directs his steps."

May the LORD direct your steps in 2011 and bless your family this Christmas as we once again celebrate His birth.

Love,
Chad, Emily & Benjamin
Remembering ^Abby^ and waiting for Hope!

Bilateral Agreement - Update!

Delegations from the United States and Russia met December 1-3, 2010 in Washington, D.C. for the fifth round of talks on a bilateral agreement regarding intercountry adoptions. The talks were fruitful, and further progress was made. Several key issues remain under discussion; however, both sides remain committed to reaching an agreement. A decision on scheduling future talks will be taken once both sides complete respective interagency reviews of the draft text.

Usborne, Coffee & The Journey to Hope

We have raised almost $1,000 for the Journey to Hope through Usborne Book sales since our first show in October. Thanks to each of you who hosted a show for us and/or purchased books! I am doing one last show to help us reach our goal this year. Usborne Books make great Christmas gifts and there is something for every child in your life, from babies to teens (children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, friends and neighbors). I will be taking catalog orders and online orders through Monday, December 13th, to be sure books arrive in time for Christmas. Please visit our online store at the link below or ask to see a catalog and place your order before the 13th!

For those of you who do not have a need for Usborne Books but would like to find a way to support our journey this Christmas, we also have an online coffee store selling Fair Trade coffees in just about any blend you can imagine. Fair Trade Coffees also make great Christmas gifts! For every bag of coffee purchased from Just Love Coffee Roasters through our storefront, we receive $5 for the Journey to Hope (and you support an awesome organization that helps many other families and an orphanage in Ethiopia!). The link to our online coffee store is also below.

Thank you for considering Usborne Books and Just Love Coffee as Christmas gifts this year and for your help and support in bringing Hope home from Russia!

Blessings,
Chad & Emily

Click here to visit our online stores:

Usborne Books & More

Just Love Coffee Roasters

Fundraiser/Adoption Update

We have raised over $600 for the Journey to Hope since the middle of September through Usborne Books & More thanks to all of our friends and family (and their friends and family) who have generously hosted shows and/or purchased books! THANK YOU!!! We have three more bookings this month and hope to raise even more! Please keep in mind, especially with the coming holidays, you can make a purchase from our online store at any time and support the Journey to Hope. Usborne Books make great Christmas gifts and so do Fair Trade coffees! Links for both of our online stores are on the panel to the left (scroll down).

A few weeks ago, we received word that our case was being reviewed by our region and that we needed to correct a couple of discrepancies they found on our paperwork. While it was frustrating to find out that there would be another delay while we updated our documents, this was a really good sign! They are (finally) reviewing our dossier, which most likely means that they are preparing us for a referral soon. We could travel any time between now and the end of December when the government offices in Russia shut down for several weeks for the Christmas/New Years holidays. Russians celebrate New Year's twice: on January 1 and again on January 14. Before 1918, Russia used a different system for keeping track of months and years. According to this old system, January 14 is New Year's Day. So, unlike the United States, the governement offices in Russia don't re-open until mid-January. If we don't travel by the end of December, we will travel early next year. As fast as time is passing, it doesn't really feel that far off. I'm praying we'll still get our referral and travel in 2010!

While working on the updates to our documents last month, I had the pleasure of meeting a fellow adoptive family who will be adopting a little girl from Russia through our agency. We had previously "met" on our agency's support forum (online) where we discovered that we are assigned to the same region! They were also asked to update their records in preparation for their 2nd trip to Russia and I ran into them at the Secretary of State's office (in Columbus) of all places. We had about a 5 minute window to run into each other and had never seen each other face to face, yet as soon as she saw me, she knew it was me. How crazy is that? If she hadn't tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Are you Emily?" I would have never known it was her. We spent about 15 minutes chatting in Columbus after our apostilles were completed and we finally had the privilege of meeting for lunch last week. I was grateful to learn so much detailed information about their first trip and what to expect when we are in Russia for the first time. We are praying that we will get to travel with them when it's time for us to meet Hope and when they go back for their court date to bring home their daughter. If you could pray for that, too, we would appreciate it very much!

Please also continue to pray for Hope's health and for patience and endurance for our family as we wait for our referral. I just know that it is imminent. We could get the call as soon as next week! But that is the rollercoaster of international adoption. It could be next week, next month, or next year. Meanwhile, we wait for Hope with hope and with great anticipation!!

Duma Vote Postponed

The State Duma decided to reschedule the vote for next Tuesday, November 23. So, it appears we have another week to wait for the results of the vote.

(Source: http://blog.russianadoptionhelp.com/2010/11/postponed-again.html)

Duma Voting on Bill 364094-5 on Wednesday

Please pray as the Russian State Duma is scheduled to vote this Wednesday on Bill 364094-5, which threatens to require a bilateral adoption treaty between a prospective adoptive parent's home country and Russia. The bill is still pending; however, it is looking considerably less likely that this bill will survive the vote.

Over the last week, additional commentary was posted to the State Duma's document database, including an opinion from the Russian Government (the collection of ministries headed by Prime Minister Vladimir Putin). The Government's written opinion concludes that the bill threatens to do harm to the rights of Russian children awaiting adoption by delaying qualified adoptive parents from other countries while the treaties are being negotiated. Their resulting recommendation to the State Duma is to vote against the bill.

Also, it appears that the State Duma's own Committee for Family, Women, and Children's Matters has also issued a recommendation to vote against the bill.

While these are merely recommendations, and the final decision is up to the State Duma, the reality is that the State Duma is not likely to vote against the will of the Prime Minister. Because of that, I suspect that this bill will go down in defeat next week, and the way will remain clear for adoptions from Russia to many other countries.

(Source: http://blog.russianadoptionhelp.com/2010/10/what-difference-week-makes.html)

Orphan Sunday

Why Love Orphans? from Christian Alliance for Orphans on Vimeo.

Fifteen Months

I actually almost lost track of how long we've been waiting now! We started this journey in November 2008 when we went to that first FTIA meeting and began the process of deciding if adoption was for us. We made our final decision in February 2009, submitted our application in March and began the process in April. Our completed dossier was sent to Russia in July 2009, and we've been paper pregnant ever since. So, officially, we've been waiting for 15 months! Our turn to travel and meet our daughter should be coming very soon!!

Last week, I had the privilege of talking with another family who is on this journey with us. They received their invitation to travel in August and returned from their first trip to meet their daughter in September. They are assigned to the same region as us, so they were able to share some invaluable tips that will make our first trip much easier. I was told that going to Moscow is like taking a trip to New York City. However, arriving in our region is like stepping 50-60 years back in time and the orphanage, even further.

There are many things they were able to share with us that I'm uncertain I am allowed to share here, so I'll resist the temptation to do so. Suffice it to say, we are really happy that we made the decision to adopt from Russia and more excited that we are closer than ever to the day we will finally meet Hope!

Help me raise money with Usborne Books & More!

I'm excited to announce that I am starting my own home business selling Usborne books as a way to support our adoption efforts! As I was praying about ways that I could raise money to support our adoption financially, I thought, "What could I sell that I really believe in and that people would actually want to buy?" Usborne books immediately came to mind ...

Usborne books are wonderfully colorful, imaginative and visually stimulating! They entice children to dive into the infomation and surface again eager to learn more. From enchanting baby board books to puzzle books that stretch the imagination, there are books for every child (including the child within us all). I enjoy these books almost as much as my son does! We have never passed an Usborne display without being drawn in to take a look and usually buying a book or two. They are that good! And many are internet-linked for additional learning. We recently bought a book called, "1000 Words in Russian" and are enjoying learning some Russian words and phrases in preparation for our travel. Needless to say, Usborne books are a product that I can sell and believe in.

In order to meet my initial obligation, I need to schedule 6 home shows in the next 12 weeks. If you are interested in helping me by hosting a home show, please contact me so we can set a date. Or if you would rather do an eShow (online), I can do that, too! The great thing is that as you help me, you also help yourself to free products! You get $20 of free books for the first $150 in sales, $30 for $200, $40 for $250 and so on. The higher the sales, the more in free books you can earn! And as a brand new consultant, I can offer my hosts/hostesses DOUBLE FREE BOOKS for shows of $250 or more.

I am depending on my friends and family to help me get my business started and raise the money we need to complete our adoption. Please help me by hosting an Usborne Books & More home show this fall!

Many Thanks,
Emily

Click on the link below to visit my online store and see what makes Usborne books so great. If you do not wish to host a home show (or eShow), you can make a purchase directly from my online store:

Emily Werner's Usborne & More Online Store
Thank you for helping us bring Hope home from Russia!

Update to the "One Year" Update!!

Wow, a lot can change in four days! When I posted the update on Monday, we were one of three families waiting in our region. As of this afternoon, we are now one of only TWO families in our agency still waiting for our referral/invitation to travel in our region. Just two months ago, we were one of seven families waiting. One month ago, we were one of four. One week ago, we were one of three! And now it looks like we'll be invited to travel and meet our little girl very, very soon! :)

One Year Update

It has now been just over one year since we submitted our dossier and began our wait to meet Hope. We have had a lot of inquiries lately, so we thought it was time for an update on our travel status. After months of inactivity in our region, a family from our agency was invited on their first trip this week. They will travel at the end of this month. That makes us one of three remaining families in our agency to be invited to travel in our region. We remain hopeful that we will receive our first trip invitation in the next few months (or less). When we were assigned to our region in March, we were told it would be 2-4 months until we travel, which would have had us going on our first trip this summer. However, the incident involving the adoptive mother who put her son on a plane back to Moscow in April caused a major disruption in the process. You can read our previous blogs for a series of updates on the status of a bilateral agreement in progress between the United States and Russia resulting from this incident. There are several advantages that will come with this new agreement. There will be even more transparency in the medical and emotional history provided about adopted children. There will also be more training for families wanting to adopt. And the process will be more streamlined, which ultimately benefits all parties. Now that an agreement is near finalization, it appears that adoption activity is increasing again and families are finally being invited to travel in all regions, so we are confident that our turn is coming soon! Please continue to pray for us as we wait to finally meet Hope! We are so close ...

Another US/Russia Bilateral Agreement Update

From our agency today:

Articles have been recently released from various news outlets regarding the status of the Bilateral Agreement. The articles seem to indicate that the outcome of the Agreement includes that single persons and homosexual persons will not be allowed to adopt from Russia. Please note that nothing official has been released by the US or Russian governments with regard to the content/terms of the Agreement. While it is possible that these items may be included, nothing is final until the Agreement is signed into law in both countries.

Please visit the US Embassy in Moscow website for the current official statement regarding the Bilateral Agreement: http://moscow.usembassy.gov/st_adopt072610.html

Visit the JCICS website for their most current statement: http://www.jcics.org/Russia.htm

Once the text of the Agreement is actually finalized by the two parties involved in creating the agreement, it will be sent for further approval by Ministry of Justice, Ministry of Internal Affairs, Ministry of Foreign Affairs, and the Prosecutor General’s Office. After that, it will be sent to the Russian government and on to the Duma to be approved as law. According to Russian officials it will be complete by the end of the year.

In the meantime, activity seems to be picking up in Russia as an agreement draws near. We have been told by our agency that our region will (finally) be inviting one of the four families assigned to our region to travel in August or September of this year. Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we continue to wait for our first trip invitation!

US/Russia Bilateral Agreement Update

We have learned that the US and Russian officials are meeting this week to review the Bilateral Agreement again. We anticipate that there will be no complications or opposition. On the Russian side, once the Agreement is complete, it will be sent for review/approval to several Ministry offices as well as to the Prosecutor General’s Office in Moscow. Then it will go before the Russian Duma (Parliament), where it will hopefully be signed into law. It is believed that this could be finalized by the end of the year. At this point, we know only one of the terms of the agreement: There will be no more independent adoptions allowed in Russia. Adoptions may only be completed by agencies accredited in Russia (our agency is one of them).

We do have some potentially good news from our agency: our region has indicated the possibility of a first trip invitation in August or September for one of the four families currently waiting to travel. That means we have a 25% chance of still traveling this summer! Our region had previously been on hold since April when the Russian goverment decided to pursue an agreement with the US before continuing with international adoptions. We remain hopeful and ask that you continue to keep us in your prayers as we wait!

The Gift of Hope

For we were saved in this hope,
but hope that is seen is not hope;
for why does one still hope for what he sees?
But if we hope for what we do not see,
we eagerly await for it with perseverance.
Romans 8:24-25 NKJV
I am Hope
I give you more than future glory,
I am your present glory.
I understand when you are uncertain
about My will,
when you cry out in despair
for the life of a loved one,
the mending of a relationship
that has gone awry like a sprung coil,
or for physical healing.
Do not lose heart,
do not lose hope,
because I hear
and I answer.
My ears are not closed to your voice;
I know your heart, I hear you,
but My perfect will does not flop like fish
on the sand. I cannot change
because you insist
you know better than I.
Allow My written Word,
which throbs with the power of hope,
to enter your mind and body
like fresh blood in your veins,
new life in your thoughts.
Your faith is the very substance,
that is, the express image,
of what what you hope for.
The unseen answer is
your present assurance
and evidence of the fulfillment
of My loving promises to you.
You have what you have asked for.
Take My mind, My wisdom,
My knowledge, My understanding,
these My gifts to you,
to give you hope,
for your hope is My Son,
the One who builds your mansion even now.
Tell Me, how will you recognize the sound
of His holy hammer and chisel
without hope?
Caress the sister of love,
which is My gift of hope,
for you have not been guided
by human wisdom, no.
I have taught you by My Holy Spirit,
so now! Bulldoze the mountains,
sound the battle cry,
prepare to win!
Your hope of glory
is Christ in you.

Update from Russia Today

Thank you!

We just wanted to extend a big THANKS to everyone who helped with our garage sale fundraiser last weekend. Once again we made over $1,000, this time towards our travel expenses (last year we used the $1,000 we made to pay for our home study). We could travel as soon as summer or early fall. We are getting closer every day! Here are some pictures from the event. Thanks to all of the friends and family who came out to see us and help bring Hope home from Russia!

Garage Sale Fundraiser This Weekend

Thank you to everyone for your generous donations of items for our adoption garage sale fundraiser! We are all set for this weekend and have an amazing selection of bargains! I posted a listing with details including items for sale on both Craig's List and Garage Sale Cow last night. Links to both listings are below. Please spread the word and be sure to join us this weekend! Last year we raised enough for our home study. This year's proceeds will help with our travel expenses. We expect to travel sometime this summer or fall. Thanks to everyone who has given or helped in some way on this long journey. We wouldn't be this far
without you!!!

Craig's List

Garage Sale Cow

Russia Update

Here is the latest news on Russia from the most reliable sources:

US State Department

Joint Council on International Childrens Services

Also some good news reported by the Moscow Times:

The Moscow Times

Our agency is reporting activity again, so it appears that things are moving, albeit slowly, and Russia will remain open for international adoption while the two countries work out an agreement.

Garage Sale Fundraiser

Dear Friends & Family,

May 21st through 23rd is the annual Great US 50 yard sale (www.route50.com/yardsale.html), and we are planning to use it as an opportunity to raise money for our Journey to Hope again this year!

If you have any clothes (childrens), toys, furniture or household items that you've been wanting to get rid of and are willing to allow the proceeds to go to our adoption fund, please let us know. We can even come box it up and haul it away for you (as long as you are in town!). All you have to do is have it ready to go!! Or you can drop it off at our house any time up until the sale.

Please be sure to spread the word to your Cincinnati area friends, family and coworkers (even if you're not able to come) and/or bring a friend and come buy some stuff yourself! All proceeds will go to the "Journey to Hope" adoption fund.

We are so thankful to friends and family like you that have helped us get this far on our adoption journey. We still have a long way to go ... please help us bring HOPE home from Russia!

Blessings,
Chad, Emily & Benjamin, too!

Mother's Day

I was once the childless woman on Mother's Day. For six years, we longed to be parents and wondered if we would ever be blessed with that which seemed to come so easily for everyone but us. Then came our Benjamin and I was finally able to celebrate Mother's Day with a child in my arms. I have also been the bereaved woman on Mother's Day. After only two years of joyful celebrations, Mother's Day became bittersweet for me because of my daughter's death. I celebrated for the child in my arms and grieved for the child I could no longer hold. I wondered if Mother's Day would ever be joyful for me again. Now I am the waiting mother; waiting for a 4th Mother's Day for our rainbow to come; full of hope and longing for the day she will finally be here; full of joy for the child still in my arms; and, by the grace of God, full of peace over the child I am no longer able to hold, but will see again one day in Heaven. I now see Mother's Day so differently. I see it as an opportunity to send a card to a bereaved mother whose child cannot be in her arms this Mother's Day. And a way to love on the mothers who are taking care of sick children who may not be here for another Mother's Day. It's also an opportunity to care about the women who want to be mothers, but are on the infertility rollercoaster and grieving each month for the child that was not conceived, as well as all of the motherless daughters and sons whose mother's are not here to be celebrated. Mother's Day is bittersweet for so many people. Please take time this weekend to reach out to a mother who needs your love.

And for my friends who are childless or missing a child this Mother's Day (and those who love them), this is for you ...

For the Childless Woman on Mother's Day
(click the link above to view)

Russia Update

Here's the latest update on the situation in Russia. The next meeting is scheduled for May 12th. It looks hopeful and we've received updates from our agency indicating that adoptions are still going through during negotiations. We won't be sure how this affects our timeline until this summer. Please keep praying that the process will not be delayed unnecessarily and that the doors to Russia remain open!

U.S. Department of State Announcement

A Hope Blessing

Today we were given "A Hope Blessing" (baby shower) for Hope. Since we don't know how big she is yet, everyone gave gift cards, money and special mementos for her memory book. My favorite gift was a frame of our family, including Abby, and an opening for a photo of Hope. It was nice that someone thought to include her, too! Here are some pictures from the party. It was meant to be a surprise, but it turned out that I couldn't come at the time the party was planned, so they told me. But I did not know who was invited until I showed up (Chad and his mom made up the guest list) or what the theme of the party was. Thank you Chad and "Nana" Linda for making "Hope's Blessing" a special day ...

AMOS STORY
Aaron Ivey. ©2009 IVEYMUSIC. (ASCAP)

Another photograph to wrestle in my head
Another sleepless night on concrete featherbed
These thoughts of you like bullets to my soul
We’ve got to find a way to get you home

I’ll find a way to get you here
If it takes my fleeting breath
Another sunrise hits the ground
And it’s a dark lonely sight
Lightyears away I hope you know
There is somebody searching
For the way to get you here

I will get you here

Throw the clocks away and run out to the street

We’ll fly to distant clouds where it’s just you and me
A day will come when all of this is gone

You’ve got to find a way to believe

I’ll find a way to get you here
If it takes my fleeting breath
Another sunrise hits the ground
And it’s a dark lonely sight
Lightyears away I hope you know
There is somebody searching
For the way to get you here
I will get you here

Close your eyes and dream of a better day with me
As angels hold you tight, may you sleep in peace tonight

So dream, dream, dream my child
Hear the whisperings of hope

It’s a song that you can sing, as you sleep in peace tonight

Another Update

Here is another update on Russia Intercountry Adoption. The Department of State has received no official notification that adoptions from Russia to the United States have been suspended. However, it appears that the adoption process has slowed down.

Volcanic ash prevented the U.S. delegation from traveling to Moscow over the April 17th weekend. The delegation now plans to travel to Moscow during the week of April 25. Please continue to pray that the door to intercountry adoption in Russia remains open!!

Joint Council on International Children's Service

U.S. Department of State Intercountry Adoption

Update

Here is an update on the current situation in Russia. Despite news to the contrary, it appears that adoptions have NOT been suspended. In fact, our agency has reported that several American families currently in Russia have been permitted to proceed with their adoptions. A delegation from the US State Department is scheduled to meet with Russian officials next week in Moscow regarding the ongoing situation. While there is always the risk of shutdown in international adoption, including Russia, most insiders are optimistic and do not believe the situation regarding the Russian adoptee from Tennessee will lead to a shutdown of adoptions to American families.

We are waiting patiently through this with HOPE and trusting God for the outcome. We know His heart is for the orphan, so He surely cares about this even more than we do! Please continue to pray for us while we wait and for all of the families and children who are waiting, too. Thanks for all of your prayers and encouragement the last few days and for taking time to sign the petition this week. We will keep you posted as we hear more!!

Russia Adoption Confusion Rattles US Families

Update on Status of Russian Adoption
"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." ~ James 1:27

Call to Action from the JCICS

A year ago today, we found out that our application to begin the process of adopting a child internationally was accepted and we officially began our "Journey to Hope!" By now you have heard the news about the 7 year old boy who was put on a plane and "returned" to the Ministry of Education in Russia by his American adoptive mother after living in America for only 6 months. Russia was and is currently still open to adoptions by foreign citizens. We just found out last month that we have been assigned a region and are less than 4-6 months away from our first trip to finally meet Hope after a year of waiting. Now, due to the current crisis, the Ministry for Foreign Affairs and the Child's Rights Ombudsmen in Russia have called for a suspension on adoption to U.S. citizens. We need your help!

Please help keep the doors to intercountry adoption open so we can continue on our journey to bring Hope home from Russia. The Joint Council on International Child Services (JCICS) has issued a call to action for people who have adopted, are in the process of adopting, or know someone who is adopting to help children in Russia who are in need of a permanent and safe family (as well as helping waiting families bring home their adopted children). Suspending adoption does not protect children but only subjects them to the depravity of an institution, and an entire life without a family. Please take a moment to visit the link below and sign the letter being sent to President Obama and President Medvedev before Tuesday night. There are also some other ideas listed on their website for ways you can help.
JCICS Campaign and Call to Action
Thank you, friends. Your voice and ours can make a difference!

Trusting God

We found out on Friday with the rest of the world that a 7 year old boy was returned to Russia by his adoptive mother like unwanted parcel. She had her mother put him on a plane, unaccompanied, and paid a man $200 to meet him at the airport in Moscow and "return" him to the Ministry of Education with only a note to explain she did not want to parent him anymore. Not surprisingly, Russian officials were outraged and have threatened to put a freeze on all Russia-U.S. adoptions. Like the rest of us, they could not believe someone would be so cruel to a young child. Especially one of their own. As they should, Russia is taking this very seriously. However, for families like mine who are in the middle of an international adoption, this means more red tape and more waiting. Click here to read a statement from the Joint Council on International Children’s services sent to us by our agency:

Joint Council Statement on Current Events in Russia
As for the actions of this mother, I am having a hard time believing that she did not know the risks involved in adopting this child. The training we received from our agency specifically addressed all possible issues and disorders associated with adopting and parenting a "waiting" child. We were required to undergo 10 hours of pre-adoption training and our social worker spent hours preparing us for what to expect when we bring our child home. There is no way to enter this process without knowing that these children often come with emotional and/or developmental problems, especially at 7 years old. We were informed to expect some issues and that the older the child, the more severe the issues could be. It does not mean that every child adopted internationally comes with severe emotional or behavioral problems, but that it is prudent to be prepared for the worst. Our agency provided excellent training and preparation for dealing with sensory integration disorder, reactive attachment disorder, fetal alcohol syndrome, and many other problems common among children who are adopted internationally. While I am not sure who is at fault (the mother, her agency, or her social worker), it is clear that she did not have realistic expectations going into this adoption. You cannot expect a 7 year old boy who was taken from his birth family at age 6, put in an orphanage for a year, then taken to a foreign country where he has had his name and identity changed and was given a new "mommy" not to come with psychological issues. Even without the training required for adopting internationally or guidance from a qualified social worker, logic says that a child in this situation would have problems.

That said, we still believe we are called to adopt this little girl from Russia and that God has uniquely equipped us to be her parents. We knew going into this that there would be obstacles and we are belieiving our all-powerful God to work out this seemingly huge problem. Less than a year ago, our agency was blacklisted by Russia for incompliance on post-adoption reporting requirements (along with hundreds of other U.S. agencies as part of Russia's attempt to tighten the process and filter out the "bad" ones). We worried then what would happen, but it was resolved without any impact on our process. If God could see us through that, He can see us through this. Nothing is too big for our God. And His heart is for the orphan. He does not want to see the hundreds of thousands of orphans in Russia lose their opportunity for a forever family any more than we do. So, we will trust God and wait ... again.

Thank you for your continued support and prayers as we wait to bring Hope home from Russia. We should hear something from our agency this week about how the current situation will impact our adoption, so please check back soon!!

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." ~ Philippians 3:14

Prayer Request for Hope

As our date to bring Hope home from Russia has moved up and we now know that she has been born (based on our timeline and preferences stated in our dossier, she is at least two months old now), we feel that it is more important than ever that we pray very specifically for her while she waits for us in her orphanage. In Russia, children typically arrive at the orphanages from hospitals not long after they are born. 70% are physically or mentally delayed. Most have mild or moderate issues. The downside for these children is that their issues get ignored or overlooked because they are subtle or harder to identify. Children who lack sufficient human touch and interaction as infants, often fail to have healthy emotional and cognitive development. Usually in orphanages, the caregiver to child ratio is high, so the necessary one-to-one attention needed for proper development is absent.

With this in mind, we sat down this weekend and brainstormed some very specific prayer needs to send out and ask you to pray. We know that statistics are statistics, but with prayer, we can make a difference in Hope's life even before she comes home to us. Please consider the following specific prayer needs when you pray for Hope:

* Pray that she has the necessary sensory rich and emotionally nurturing
experiences to help create healthy connections in her brain

* Pray that she is held and talked to by a loving caregiver each and
every day

* Pray that she is responded to and picked up when she cries

* Pray that a loving caregiver holds her when she takes her bottle
(versus propping it up in her crib)

* Pray that her spirit is ministered to and that she senses the presence
of God in her life

* Pray that she is not being neglected or mistreated in any way

* Pray for protection over her body and her heart (emotions)

* Pray that she has the right nutrition so her body can grow healthy
and strong

* Pray that she would not suffer from depression as many children,
even infants, in orphanages do

* Pray that she would not develop sensory or attachment disorders or
any other disorder common among children who have lived in orphanages

* Pray that her surroundings are peaceful and that she feels safe, warm
and comforted in her current environment

* Pray for the healing of any negative or traumatic memories she may
carry with her from the womb to the present

* Pray for her dreams, that God would speak to her and show her the
plans He has for her -- perhaps even that she could see our faces
or her new room in her dreams before she arrives

* Pray that she would know that she is loved and wanted

* Pray for her caregivers so that they would be able to meet her
needs and the needs of all of the babies in their care

* Pray for encouragement for all of the workers in her orphanage as
many get depressed and emotionally exhausted from their work

* Pray that her orphanage would have all the funding and supplies
that it needs

* Pray for her birth family (if they are still living), for comfort
In their grief and peace in knowing she will have a loving home

* Pray that, as her adoptive parents, we would know how to love her,
respond to her and meet her needs

* Pray that God would provide the finances for the rest of our
adoption fees/expenses and for our travel this summer

* Pray that He would prepare each person in our immediate and extended
family to receive, accept and love her as one of our own

These were just the first things that came to mind as we sat down and thought about how to pray. We covet your prayers and will keep you updated as we get closer to the date that we will travel. As of right now, it looks to be sometime between July and September. In the meantime, we are working with our social worker to update our home study and complete the required updates to our dossier before our first trip. Please pray that we would have the focus and energy for all of the work that still needs to be done.

Thank you for your ongoing love, support, encouragement and especially your prayers! They mean the world to us!!

We have a region!

We just received word today that we have been assigned to a region in southwest Russia and will receive our invitation to travel in the next 4-6 months!!!! That's 4 months less time than we originally anticipated and we are just beside ourselves with joy! Our baby could be home by Christmas!!!

We will be invited to travel to Russia sometime between July and September of this year. The purpose of our trip will be to meet her, ask questions of the orphanage director/doctor, and decide whether or not to accept the referral. If we accept, we will submit our petition to adopt then return home and wait for our court date. In the meantime, we have LOTS of paperwork to do, so please keep us in your prayers!!

We are so happy and excited and couldn't wait to share the news! Hope
is born!!

Eight Months

Well, if I were physically pregnant, I would only have one month to go until the birth of my baby. But in a "paper" pregnancy, it takes a lot longer. We still have 4-10 months go go until we get to meet her and another 4-6 months after that until we'll finally bring her home. I feel like an elephant, lol! Right now we are in the process of updating our home study and other documents for our dossier that are about to expire (Russia requires updates to most documents one year after they were originally signed). We are also planning to have another garage sale fundraiser this spring ... details to follow soon!!

I spent a great deal of time with an adopted friend recently and have been learning so much from her perspective. Her adoptive parents wanted her desperately, but her experience growing up was that their needs were greater than hers. She felt that she was there to heal their wounds, meet their needs and to love them. Now, as an adult, she is working through deep wounds and scars of her own. It made me think of how I can prepare in my heart for what Hope will need when she is finally ours. Her mere presence in our lives will bring healing to us. Just to hold her hand and kiss her face will be enough. She is not a replacement for our birth daughter and we are not replacements for her birth parents. I realize this. But I also realize that, as we are given the privilege and responsibility for this tiny little soul, she will come with great needs and those needs are more important than ours. As her parents, it will be our job to find out what those needs are and do our best to meet them ... to help heal her wounds and to love her unconditionally. We will have to put our own needs and agenda aside and learn how to love this little person in such a way that she can receive it. This is laying down your life for one you love. This is John 15:13.

Someone mentioned the book, "The Five Love Languages" to me this week. I was reminded that when people try to love us, they don't always speak our language. For example, my love language is "words of affirmation." If you have ever received a card from me, then you know what I'm talking about. I usually end up writing a book! I can't help it. I will go to great lengths to find just the right card to express how I feel and often add my own words, too (because anyone can "just" send a card). For that reason, I also like meaningful gifts that symbolize something important to me, but words are my primary love language. That is why I journal and blog, and send cards and write letters. I love to express myself in words and I love when others do the same for me. However, Chad's love language is "acts of service." He could wash the car, clean the house and do the laundry and I still wouldn't feel any more loved by him. I need his words like I need air to breathe. He has learned that to love me, he needs to speak my language. And I need to speak his.

So perhaps this dear friend whose adoptive parents were unable to meet her needs simply did not speak her love language. Or maybe they never took the time to learn it. So the question is ... is that love? If we only love others in ways that that are comfortable for us (i.e. in our own love language), are we really loving at all? Is this what it means to "lay down your life" for a friend? To find out what the other person needs and give it even if it doesn't come "naturally" to us? An excuse we often use is "well, that's just now how I'm wired." Even if it's not how I'm wired, I want to try to love Hope that way. I want to lay it all down and give her what she needs because I love her. I want to try to speak her love language so she can grow up feeling loved and whole even without her birth parents. I want to love her regardless of what I get in return. Because in the end, there is no greater love.

"To love someone is to learn the song in their heart and to sing it to them when they have forgotten." ~ Unknown

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." ~ John 15:13

Toys for Tots

I received a call from my mom late last night saying that our story was featured on the local Marines Toys for Tots website and newsletter after receiving donations from our family in Hope's honor and Abby's memory at Christmas over the last two years. Here is a link to the story. I am so touched and proud of my girls! ♥

Toys for Tots Article
We are blessed and honored to have been featured and to have been able to give to other little girls in their names. It is truly more blessed to give than to receive!

On another note, all of our documents are about to expire, so it's time to get busy updating everything. The Russian Federation requires that all documents in our 81-page dossier are current within one year of the signature date at all times in order to be considered valid. It will be exactly one year on April 20th since our first document was signed and notarized (hard to believe it's been a year!). It takes about 10-14 days for our agency to ship the documents to Russia and one to two weeks to have them translated. Therefore, the updated documents have to be submitted to our agency about one month before the previously submitted ones expire.

So in addition to homeschooling Benjamin (which is a full-time job in and of itself), my job this spring will be printing and updating forms, running from here to there to get everything signed and notarized again, getting certifications from the county and apostilles from the state, and making sure we stay in complaince. We will also need to update our home study, which may take from 1 to 2 months to complete depending on how fast the background checks/clearances can be obtained. We will now have been fingerprinted by the FBI twice, something I never thought I'd do! We will begin the home study process later this month to be sure it is completed and submitted on time. Boy, this feels like dejavu ... haven't I done all this before??? I'm feeling a little overwhelmed, but I know that God will give me the strength to get it all done, just as He always does ...

Thanks again for all of your kindness, love and support over this last year since we began this Journey to Hope. And a HUGE thank you to Toys for Tots for showing your support and love for our family!!

Stages of Waiting

I love this! Our adoption agency sends out a weekly update on where different families are in the adoption process and how much closer we are to our referral. They always include an article of interest or something to encourage waiting families. This was in last week's update and I thought it was worth sharing! We have already experienced many of these "Stages of Waiting" ...

"The Stages of Waiting"
Written By: Julie Corby

Fifteen months ago my husband and I filled out an application to adopt siblings from Ethiopia. Are you familiar with the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross model for the stages of grief? It consists of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I feel like the waiting process during our adoption has taken me through similar distinct stages. While it may be true that the only thing that Dr. Kübler-Ross and I have in common is that she was a psychiatrist and I need a psychiatrist, I believe that these "Stages of Waiting" do, in fact, exist.

Stage 1 >> Relief. My husband and I have finally landed on the same page regarding our family building. We agree on the country. We agree on the agency. We agree to the expense.

Stage 2 >> Joy. There is a light at the end of a long, nine-year tunnel. I've become a member of a club that has, up until now, excluded me. I have a spring in my step. I can walk by a playground without weeping. I can talk about preschool. I'm childproof. I tell everyone I know about our plans.

Stage 3 >> The win/win-naiveté-Melissa Fay Greene Stage. I read There Is No Me Without You. I think, not only am I helping myself, I am helping Africa. We want kids, and millions of orphans need families. It is a win/win situation.

Stage 4 >> Ethical questioning. Many Ethiopian children placed for adoption are not actually orphans. In fact, a lot of them have parents, as well as siblings. They are relinquished because their family cannot afford to feed them. This is when I start wrestling a lot: "If I really cared about Ethiopia, I would take these thousands of dollars we're paying in adoption fees and donate them to an organization that would do everything it could to preserve this family."

Stage 5 >> I am a selfish jerk. My white, privileged need to have a family is much stronger than my need to help Ethiopia. My mothering hormones are not going to be dissipated by my concern for struggling Africans. I am a jerk.

Stage 6 >> Bargaining. I am a selfish jerk, but I agree to change my need. This is when I announce to my husband one morning, "I think that we should adopt a 12-year-old from Ethiopia, instead. We will make sure that she is a true orphan, an only child, and HIV-positive. We have good health insurance." (At this point I think my husband, who likes more than anything to make a decision and stick with it, is starting to wonder why he ever married me in the first place.)

Stage 7 >> Outrage. Why doesn't everyone know how bad things are around the world? Why aren't people doing more? Unfortunately, this outrage turns into self-righteousness and a judgmental attitude, which send me spiraling back to...

Stage 8 >> Guilt. I feel guilty for judging, guilty for adopting, guilty for eating. You name it, I feel guilty.

Stage 9 >> Resolve. I will do something. I will raise awareness. I will start a project that will help. I will make a difference.

Stage 10 >> Renewed optimism. It's OK. We will move forward. I'll call our agency and write the check for the third payment they requested. I will continue to read about parenting. I will do my best to be a mother to these two children.

Stage 11 >> Doubt in the adoption. Are we doing the right thing? Our agency has worked in Ethiopia for a long time, and I am fairly confident that they operate in an ethical manner. But really, how would I know? I do know that the program has changed dramatically in the past year, because so many more people are choosing Ethiopia.

Stage 12 >> Doubt in myself. Am I too (insert any of these adjectives here: old, dejected, cynical, impatient, selfish) to adopt?

Stage 13 >> Doubt that it will ever happen. We know several couples who applied after we did who have already received their referrals, have traveled, and are now happily ensconced with their new families. Is this just one more thing that works out for everyone except us? I have days when I believe that we will never get to adopt. This feels precarious, and reminds me of a feeling I've had before. Our four pregnancies didn't work out, so why did I think this would? (This stage also involves envy, but envy is so yucky, let's not give it its own stage.)

Stage 14 >> Disillusionment. This is when all of your warm and fuzzy feelings about adoption don't feel warm and fuzzy anymore. They feel messy and worrisome.

Stage 15 >> Exhilaration. A couple of weeks ago, I was at home with my husband and our dogs. All of the sudden, I thought, "This is going to happen! We are going to be parents! There will be children here, in our house, SOON!" I grinned like an idiot. This stage lasted exactly 90 minutes.

Stage 16 >> Unexpected, renewed faith in humanity. Where have you people been all my life? There is something special about the adoption community. It takes someone with a big heart, I think, and at least some sense of adventure, to adopt. I am so grateful to have met so many incredible people on this journey. I mean it.

Stage 17 >> Joyful, Uneasy anticipation. The uneasiness may disappear when we get our referral, but maybe it is important to always feel uneasy. Being a prospective adoptive parent is complicated. Obviously, the people who are really going through something are the birth families and the children. Their losses are much more difficult and devastating. If I am lucky enough to become a parent, I must continue to question. I will do my best to remain observant, to monitor agencies' activities and message boards, to help those who come after me, and to help those who are left behind.

The feelings of joy and anticipation are substantially less complicated. In January 2008, our social worker let us know we were Waiting Family #103. Today, we are Waiting Family #3. We want this more than anything. I can't wait to see my husband be a father. I can't wait for my parents to meet their grandchildren. I can't wait to sing someone to sleep, to make someone laugh, and to bandage a skinned knee. We are ready for our joyful, uneasy, happy ending.

Follow Julie's story at:www.theeyesofmyeyesareopened.blogspot.com

Seven Months

Where do I begin this blog? After 7 months, the waiting has finally become ... HARD! Maybe it's because it's winter and we're cooped up in the house more than ever. Maybe it's because on these long cold days, I wish Abby were here playing with her brother. Maybe it's because I wish Hope would hurry up and come home so Benjamin would have someone to play with. Or maybe it's just because the waiting is ... hard. I think it's a lot of things.

I told my husband the other day that he is married to a bear. Yes, a bear. I hibernate. Don't wake me up in my hibernation or you might get mauled, lol! Really, it's a good illustration of what winter does to my soul. I want to curl up in my cave and not come out until spring. Anything that upsets me makes me want to ROAR! What a great illustration of the winter blahs. I think it's what I have had for a long time. Put wanting, hoping, praying and waiting for another little person to grace our lives with that, plus a little boy who is starting to express his feelings of wishing his sister were here, and knowing there is nothing I can do about it, and it can get somewhat yucky! It's been a long winter.

On the other hand, we have so much hope, so much anticipation to see what is going to unfold as the snow melts and spring flowers push their way up through the dirt this spring. Another wonderful illustration of our human struggle. We are like the seeds in the ground, pushing up against the frozen soil. We have to wrestle through and push against the resistance in our lives in order to bloom. Sometimes it's a battle and it seems like we will never get there, but alas spring comes and the flowers are abundant and when it happens, it is so beautiful it takes our breath away! I am amazed at all of the illustrations in nature. Spring, summer, fall, winter ... but spring always comes!!! The snow is melting and I am waiting in anticipation for my spring!

I got the privilege to meet Mary Beth Chapman this week at the ECM annual banquet. I was reminded of the verse in Song of Solomon, which is also an old Vineyard worship song: "He brought me to His banqueting table and His banner over me is love." I had been desperately needing a reminder of God's love for me and received it in the form of a tender gesture by a beloved brother-in-Christ who also happened to be the host of the evening. I saw him earlier in the night and he said, "You would like to meet Mary Beth tonight, wouldn't you? I will see what I can do to make that happen." So, as everyone was seated and the meal was served, he came to me and without a word, took me by the hand from my table in the back of the room and walked me all the way to the head table where he introduced me as "someone very special who wants to meet you." I was able to thank her in person for the Show Hope grant and share about my daughters, Abby and Hope, and this journey we have been on. It was equally special to me that she shares both journeys. And, although it was Matt who walked me to the head table, it felt like Jesus himself was taking me to His table and saying, "You are special to me and I want to do this for you." I felt loved by my Father.

The whole evening was full of the Father's love. I was seated at a table next to a dear friend who I didn't even know was coming and as we began talking, I noticed another person next to her whose name was familiar. The it came to me and I asked, "Didn't you adopt a little boy from Russia 3 years ago?" And she said, "Yes, how did you know?" Over a year ago, I had called her as a reference for the agency we were choosing to coordinate our adoption and we had spoken for nearly 2 hours on the phone. We shared how lonely and isolating this journey can feel and how wonderful it is when we meet someone who has experienced it, too. There are no coincidences. I needed a friend who knows what I'm going through and God brought her to my table. We exchanged numbers and agreed to get together and let our boys play so we could talk more about our adoptions and how our lives have changed since starting this journey.

In the winter of my soul, God has and continues to place people in my life to encourage me and nudge me along the path so I don't retreat and hibernate in my cave. He brings the refreshment I desperately need just when it's needed. And He continues to remind me, "Emily, you are My girl. And your spring is coming!"

I am my Beloved's and my Beloved is mine.
~ Song of Solomon 6:3

Six Months

Chad and I bought these t-shirts for each other this Christmas. Benjamin has one that says, "Anxiously awaiting the arrival of my little sister from Russia." We needed something to help make all of this more real and tangible. 2010 is here and we closer than ever to bringing our baby girl home from Russia!!


We are now officially six months into our wait and sometime later this year we will finally see Hope's face and receive our invitation to travel to Russia! An awesome article was recently published in the Daily News Journal about Just Love Coffee Roasters, the organization that sponsors our online coffee store and gives proceeds to families who are in the process of adopting internationally. You can check it out here:

Just Love Coffee Roasters in the Daily News Journal
They raised over $20,000 for families and benevolent organizations just in their first two months of operation! Proceeds go to families adopting internationally and to an Ethiopian orphanage. Our online adoption coffee store has raised about $200 for our adoption so far. You can visit our coffee store here to view delicious Fair Trade Coffees and help support our adoption:
Werner Family Online Adoption Coffee Store
Thank you for your continued encouragement, prayers and support. We are excited about 2010 and all it will bring for our family. Please come back soon for updates on our Journey to Hope!